Ask the experts
January 29, 2018 at 10:24 pm #464
Yayyyyyy!!! I am sooo excited and was glad to join you guys for the PPVE!! =D (Hope I have an opportunity for the 1-1 session too that would be so cool!) I am so relieved that these questions will be addressed in the PPVE! That makes me soo happy!
You have helped me with putting some good perspective on how I view my art… And that it’s totally acceptable and okay to not pursue art right now… I look at what I’m able to do with it (and I think I’m good at it, which is why I’ve struggled with it, over the years…) then, I thought, well, maybe I’m meant to pursue it in another way, shape or form… just not now 🙂 Everything in Divine Timing I like to say 🙂 So, I want to thank you soooo much!! I really hope one day I get to truly live out what I’m meant to do/be….
Okay, that’s awesome! I love being surrounded by people who are in the same boat you are! It’s so motivating! Oh okay, yeah those do sound like great ideas?? Thanks! =D I will definitely look into that… I guess I should start by asking… okay, what intrigues me right now? (Lol, literally and I can tell you right now – it’s Numerology/Soulwork) And then sit down with myself, honestly ask, why? And start there… Oh, wow really? That’s cool! Do you mind if I ask, what else intrigues you about Spirituality? 🙂 You know what else I was going to do (but it costs a fortune? 🙁 )? I was going to do a Spiritual Evolvement Course and Meditation Retreat… I really feel like being in the Environment could inspire me and I could learn so much?? For me, I need to literally be with like-minded people and experiment in order to feel motivated and excited!! 🙂
Yeah, and I hear you there… Just, when I am faced with the question of what my natural interests are, I sometimes don’t know how to answer that question because of all these beliefs (either unconsciously or subconsciously)… I know right now, it’s Spirituality, but I don’t want to soul-search alone (because, in my household situation/personal life – I do feel alone in this).
Yes – I cannot wait to dive into the PPVE!!! =D
By the way, I meant to ask – Is there any way I could get a replay of the Workshop y’all had today at 1pm? Or did you have to register in order to get it? I don’t remember… lol. Also, will I have forever access to the login of the PPSC? Or do you guys end that at a certain time?
BrianneJanuary 30, 2018 at 2:35 pm #465
Brianne — I’m really glad that helped shift your perspective around how you view your art right now! And yes, it’s absolutely OK to not try to pursue it right now, and instead give yourself permission to work on your art when and how you feel like it.
I love the way you were asking yourself those discovery-type questions about what you’re interested in/curious about right now and what it’s so intriguing to you. In fact, it would be a great idea for you to do some stream-of-consciousness journaling about that where you keep asking yourself those kinds of questions and writing down your responses — just whatever comes to mind in the moment. It could be very revealing!
Oh and yes, you can absolutely get a recording of our virtual workshop from yesterday. In fact, I’ll post a link to the replay here so anyone else in this program can watch it too, if they missed it. Note: this recording will expire after Friday, Feb. 2nd. So definitely make time to watch it in the next few days!
Here’s the replay link: http://clarityonfire.com/live-workshop-replay
And yes, you have forever access to the PPSC, so you can keep coming back to this course as often as you want. There’s no expiration date!
Have a great week!January 30, 2018 at 5:13 pm #467
Hey again, Kristen!
Oh, okay, great thank you so much for putting the link there for the replay! 🙂 I’m excited to watch it! 😀
Yeah, definitely… I will have to do that.. I love how you said “in the moment” too… I think I forget to concentrate about that because I am so obsessed with my “destination”.. My “future”, that I don’t live in the now. Why do I put sooo much pressure on what CAREER I’m meant to have lol…
Okay, great thank you so much for the links!! So, these live hangouts… are y’all gonna be actually live, talking where we can see you (Like the past webinars you guys have held)? Or are they going to be pre-recorded?
Thank you, you have a great week too! Talk soon!January 31, 2018 at 3:01 pm #468
You’re welcome! 🙂 And yep, the PPVE live hangouts are actually live, where you can watch Rachel and I real-time on video and ask questions, just like all of our past webinars.
Enjoy the workshop replay!January 31, 2018 at 10:12 pm #469
Thank you so much! I will! 🙂February 1, 2018 at 5:34 pm #470
You’re welcome, Brianne!May 12, 2018 at 4:40 pm #473CleoParticipant
Hello Rachel and Kristen,
Thanks so much for creating this quiz and course! I am definitely a true Thriver and really envy your dad’s situation. I am not very happy with my current life situation and it has even caused me to avoid interaction, especially with family around which I feel very inadequate compared to the others in my age range who all had solid (and even impressive/exciting) careers by their mid-20s. I’m almost 27 years old, educated (social sciences) and I’ve been working as a call center agent since last July.
One major value that was brought out by the Short Course is that I strongly prefer low-pressure interaction as part of my job (assuming said job requires frequent interaction, which it would be a big bonus if it didn’t). As a customer service agent I have solidified my dislike for having to be dealing with people one-on-one all the time and putting up with their negativity in a semi-high pressure style of interaction. I would very likely dislike a job/career where interaction is routinely high-pressure, high-stakes, negative and/or constant. I had briefly considered going into HR but I get the impression I would hate it for that reason.
Prior to this I was a temp Administrative Assistant for a government office in my city. I enjoyed the position very much and it was even comforting to me. However, I didn’t last very long as my supervisor decided I wasn’t picking up the material fast enough and was still asking questions 6 weeks into the temp position. It was my first job of the type and I’m positive that if I was given another month there I would have nearly everything figured out with few if any more questions. My supervisor gave me a good reference but said that next time I should take greater care to remember everything and not ask too many questions, which I would have no problem with in the future (by studying more). However it still caused me to substantially question my competence and capabilities and I wondered if I was a detail-oriented and organized person which every job calls for.
Hence, I’m currently deciding what to do long-term and am considering going back to college. I am partly considering going into Web Development or Design, but it’s a lot of hours of learning and I may end up not being that great at it (I’m terrible at anything involving numbers or math, which it’s unclear whether this type of job requires at least some degree of such). I am also thinking about going to school to become an educational assistant, as I have a very patient and caring demeanour, am great with kids and value/enjoy a school environment. However it would take a ton of energy and I might find it too stressful and draining. I was also considering going to school to become a Library Technician, which sounds like an ideal job to me but the job market seems pretty bleak.
Basically I just want to settle on a path that
a) I am, or could become very competent at (So mimimal-to-no math. Accounting is out.)
b) Has plenty of job opportunities (I think this strongly relates to freedom as well. When there are many opportunities, it’s much easier to find a new job in the same field if an unhappy or toxic situation arises.)
c) Is not dealing with people’s negativity constantly
d) Is in an environment I enjoy or at least don’t hate
e) Has reasonable hours/time off (no more than 40/week, preferably 30-36 range), as well as being stable and not on-call or always reachable (that is a HUGE dealbreaker for me).
I actually enjoy the more simple, repetitive types of tasks like my previous administrative position (or a much-lamented “data entry” job :P), but those types of jobs are getting fewer and further between, and are mostly temp.
There seem not to be very many stable career-jobs that do not involve either some type of mathematical skill, or a heavy amount of negative interaction (e.g. HR, law-related fields).
As such, I’m actually not really sure what my question is, and I do apologize for such a long post. I just feel the need to let out my thoughts which have been stirring around, to see if you have any input.
You’re awesome, and I’ve been reading your blog on and off for the past year-and-a-half. I should put it out there that so much of what you said in old blog posts made me feel so much better about myself, that my job doesn’t have to be my identity and that my passion doesn’t have to be a THING. It was probably the first time I ever heard anyone outright say that.May 15, 2018 at 2:43 pm #474
I know it sucks to be misunderstood and judged when you’re a Thriver — if only everyone could understand that not everyone needs to care about their career to the same degree! It’s tempting to feel ashamed and hurt, but I hope you’ll take heart in the fact that you are totally normal, and it’s OK if some people don’t understand your desires. Ultimately the goal of life is just to be happy. So if you achieve that, regardless of how you do it, you’ll be more successful than at last 85% of the population, for sure!
So I have a few thoughts after reading your post:
– It’s totally understandable why you’d hate a call center job. That’s a lot of people-facing interaction, plus pressure to perform. It doesn’t sound like your ideal Thriver position at all!
– I’m not sure I would totally rule out HR. It makes sense why you’re assuming that HR wouldn’t be a good fit for you, but I’m not sure you can generalize that far given how diverse the HR profession actually is. There are HR departments in almost EVERY business. They can’t all be the same. And I bet there are some that may be perfect for a Thriver. So maybe don’t write it off too quickly!
– I do NOT think that what happened in that temp position is about you AT ALL. Shaming people for asking questions is a REALLY dumb business practice, if you ask me. And it makes me wonder why they needed a temp in the first place (maybe no one wanted to work for them, given the environment, and they had a lot of turnover?). It’s natural to wonder if this was about you, and it’s good that you’re willing to take a look at your own patterns and see if there’s something you could have done better or differently, but I think you’re likely taking way too much responsibility for how this went. I could almost guarantee that this was more of a problem with them and THEIR toxic situation than with you. And I think a better employer might treat you completely differently. So I hope that one experience won’t turn you off from those types of jobs, in total, especially if you’re still interested in them.
– As far as the other options you’re considering, it sounds like you need to do some research about all of these! It doesn’t seem like you’re at the point yet where you can make a totally informed decision. So it’s time to go get informed! I have clients do this type of homework all the time. Usually they make a spreadsheet of some sort with all of their options, and then they create categories based on their non-negotiables and what’s most important to them. And then they do a lot of Googling, LinkedIn stalking, informational interviews, etc., to get as clear as they can about what the job might actually be like and how well it would align with their needs. I think you could delve into something like that for a little while to help you rule out some of these options (and potentially rule some of them in, too).
Let me know what you think! 🙂May 28, 2018 at 5:30 pm #475Gillian KParticipant
Hi Rachel and Kristen!
I’m back. Still in the same job but my role has now changed even more and I can’t get my supervisors to take my concerns seriously.
Mostly, I want to discuss the fact that I retook the Passion Profile Quiz and am now a Firestarter! I took this quiz a few times previously and always got Thriver which I thought fit me well because I love stability. I reread my notes from the Short Course and Firestarter did always intrigue me but I don’t feel like I have a solid enough vision to move forward.
Is it normal for someone to change profiles, especially from Thriver to Firestarter? All of the profiles complement each other, I know but this seems like a drastic change in my values. Honestly, I’m just so sick of working with people who don’t understand who I am but I don’t think I could work for myself either.
Thanks in advance!
GillianMay 28, 2018 at 5:55 pm #476CleoParticipant
Thanks so much for the quick response Rachel! I actually didn’t notice there was a response until yesterday, I think because I assumed you two would be too busy to respond for awhile! 😛
You make some very great points and things I hadn’t necessarily thought of! HR may not be bad everywhere you’re right, there are probably a variety of positions I can look more into. Ideally one that doesn’t involve constant high-pressure interaction. The main descriptions I find about HR online talk about dealing with people and having a lot of mediation, de-escalation types of tasks between employees and the company although it may have to do also with the positions within the department and what organization it is with. I actually don’t mind people (and miiiight be 10% tribe member) and get along with most people I meet. I have objectively strong soft skills and people skills so I’d probably be good at HR, but it definitely stresses me out to be dealing with demanding and negative people. It did occur to me however that if my job had even 25% of the high-pressure interaction it has now it would still be a big improvement in terms of bearability, so long as it isn’t the type of job that also follows me into evenings and weekends.
Probably the best things about my current position are that:
1) my bosses and coworkers are mostly positive, helpful and encouraging people (and also mostly remote even though I work in a physical center);
2) I often get to go home early if it isn’t busy, so my weeks tend to hover around 32-35 hours for most of the year unless it’s exceptionally busy;
3) The workday ends (and exits from my thoughts) as soon as I clock out!
Also thanks a bunch for the support re: temp position! It definitely feels good hearing that from an expert. I’m still applying to Administrative and related positions, by the way, but I’m getting next to no interviews, whereas when I was still in the temp position I was getting them in droves.
I guess at my level of experience it’s hard to know what “normal” is for a workplace environment. It didn’t feel toxic to me at all until it became obvious they weren’t bothering me to train me anymore because I hadn’t picked up every detail after a few weeks (and I even heard my boss mention over the phone they were looking for a replacement from his next door cubicle). Aside from the obvious negativity at the end (and the fact that it was temp), the job just seemed to flow with my life. It seemed really simple and easy, and was kind of like, “they actually pay us a well-above-minimum wage just to do THIS?”. I never dreaded a Monday, nor counted down the hours until the workday ended. I know there were other tasks they were supposed to train me for that they didn’t bother, but they didn’t sound or appear especially difficult or stressful by my standards. In fact I was kind of made to look and feel like an idiot, for example because they didn’t believe I would be able to handle reception and greet clients alone when my colleague was on her lunch break (never gave me the chance to because they didn’t trust my abilities). I know I have a rather passive, bubbly demeanour and look/sound younger than my age which could be a strike against me in many workplaces.
Certainly research is a big thing I need to do, thanks for the suggestions of how. Google is one I’ve used a lot but the information it gives usually isn’t very specific, and can be very much conflicting, especially when it’s regarding job markets and outlooks. The informational interviews (and even asking questions on Reddit once I unblock it from my browser :P) sound like better options, along with the spreadsheet. Maybe I’ll make narrowing down the choices to 1 or 2 the main goal of the next few months, alongside still applying to the administrative/data entry/reception positions. I know it’s good to have one specific goal like rounding down options, and clear out all the clutter around what family members/society would think of me due to my current low-status position.
Thanks again for the reply, sorry it’s long! I definitely plan to catch up with some of your newer blog posts to also help me on the journey 🙂May 29, 2018 at 8:52 am #477
So here’s my take — I doubt that your Profile has actually changed as much as you think it has. It’s probably more so that you always had latent Firestarter tendencies, and now they’re just rising to the surface. I would say that Passion Profiles don’t necessarily do 180s; but that in different times of our lives we have different needs, so one or the other (if we have two Profiles) will become more relevant depending on the situation.
I’m also a Firestarter/Thriver combo. And at first when I took the quiz I always got Firestarter. Now I get Thriver! It’s not that I changed a huge amount; it’s just that as time went on I started to value stability and ease and fun a lot more than starting a revolution and taking a ton of risks.
It’s pretty common for someone to get the result that they feel is LACKING in their lives. So if your situation is causing you to crave freedom and autonomy to a higher degree than you have before, it would make sense why you’d get Firestarter as a result. You tend to pay the most attention to the needs that aren’t getting met, and therefore have a stronger desire around fulfilling them. It’s not that you don’t care about being a Thriver anymore; I bet that if the situation was reversed and you had a ton of time freedom and autonomy but not income stability or predictability, you’d likely end up getting Thriver again as a result, because you were craving those values you weren’t getting met anymore. Make sense?May 29, 2018 at 9:02 am #478
Glad that was helpful!
I’m glad you listed some things that you appreciate about your current job. Those are definitely Thriver qualities! And even though it may not be perfect, I think it’s always good to find reasons to be grateful for things that DO work for you, because life is rarely just one thing (good or bad, black or white, right or wrong, etc). We can spend a lot of time focused on what’s NOT working (and working ourselves into really bad moods and ruts) and no time at all finding the good in what IS working (which typically uplifts us and makes it easier to get through the day).
Sometimes it can be hard to tell how a workplace is going to be before you get in there. But this was a good experience in that now you can ask questions in an interview setting to head this kind of problem off, in the future. It’s totally OK to say, “I’ve had an experience in the past where the employers didn’t train me, and when I asked questions they were dismissive. All while expecting me to learn how to do the job perfectly. It was a pretty toxic situation. I’m curious how you/your company handles training people and how encouraging you are of people asking questions?”
And here’s the thing — No one is going to come out and say, “Actually we have a really toxic work environment where we don’t encourage growth or learning at all!” But if that’s secretly the case, they won’t have a very good or solid answer for you. They’ll be vague and the answer won’t be helpful or impressive to you. If they DO value growth and are encouraging of questions, they’ll have a good answer and you’ll be able to sense that they do, in fact, care. You’ve just got to be comfortable asking those sorts of direct questions in an interview setting!
Keep us posted! 🙂May 29, 2018 at 8:08 pm #479Gillian KParticipant
Thank you Rachel! That makes perfect sense!
Now I just need to figure out how to move forward.June 1, 2018 at 1:58 pm #480
Glad that made sense. As far as moving forward, I think it’s always easiest to start where with where you are. So, what shifts would need to happen in your current environment to help you feel more of those Firestarter values? Clearly the Thriver values are mostly getting met (but don’t assume that fully! There may be some aspects of that that could be better, too). There could be some changes that are within your capacity to make — or within your ability to ask for — that might allow for more flexibility, autonomy, creativity, or freedom (or any of the other traditional Firestarter values). But a lot of the time we assume things “are how they are,” and don’t bother trying to make any changes. It can be an interesting thought experiment to throw out old assumptions (even just hypothetically) to allow yourself to chew on the situation from a different perspective. Let me know how it goes! 🙂June 28, 2018 at 2:46 am #484MayaMackeyParticipant
I’ve been following your blog for three years now and I finally took the leap and enrolled in the PPSC course! (YAY!)
I’m nearing the end of the program but got stuck on secondary profiles. I know you all said that you can’t be three but I feel torn between Tribe Memeber, Thriver, and Side Hutsler!
I would say Tribe Memeber is definitely my primary profile. I’m a huge people person and my Meyer’s Brigg is ESFP aka “The Entertainer” lol. I love connectig with others and having an “audience” so to speak.
Where I really get stuck is between side hustler and thriver.
Recently I left my 40 hr/week job where I was leading workshops to help high shcool girls build confidence. I loved the mission and company (hence my Tribe Memberness) but ultimately I think the distance and early hours eventually wore me out. (It was a standard 9-6 but i am NOT a morning person. I also live in Los Angeles where traffic is a 24/7 thing, so having to travel 45 mins one way to an office 5 days a week eventually killed my soul). Recently, I’m relishing in my free time but know that I have to get back to work soon. I guess I’m wondering if I’m a true Thriver or if I’m just retaliating because commuting in LA sucks and I wished I could come in the office later in the morning.
I also feel like a Side Hustler because the thought of having one career until I retire stressses me out! I do get bored easily but I’m afraid constant job-hopping looks bad and will leave me financially insecure when I’m older. I do want to retire early though (45!) so I can enjoy the rest of my life doing what I want to do as opposed to trading my time in for other’s profit.
So, am I more of a slight Thriver or slight Side Hustler?
P.S. This course is life-changing! Thank you so much for following your fire 😉 and making a difference in people’s lives.
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