Ask the experts

[Shona K]

I am most definitely primarily a Thriver. My years of resenting having to be on call and the boards, side gigs, and attempts at making money on the things I love the most make infinitely more sense to me now.

Working with a great team and work that is fulfilling are also important to me, though, so I think Tribe Member might be my secondary profile. However, I’m not sure if it’s really my secondary, or if I resonate with it because there is a LOT of overlap between these two profiles.

Can you provide a little more clarification on the differences between Thrivers and Tribe Members?

[Rachel E]

Hi Shona,

Good question! It’s definitely important to a Thriver to have a great time and work that feels important – I don’t think anyone wants to waste their time in an unhealthy environment, or doing something that means absolutely nothing to them!

Where I’d say Thriver and Tribe Member differ is that, for Tribe Members, the people and the mission are often the whole point. Whereas for Thrivers, those things are important, but the point is to have a job you enjoy, that allows you to pursue the life you really want to live outside of work. For a Tribe Member, the work is much more integral to their purpose. For a Thriver, work is a means to support them finding purpose beyond what they do to make money. Does that make sense?

[Shona K]

Thanks, Rachel. Yes, that makes sense. Given that I’d have no job at all if I could, I’m still sure I’m mostly Thriver.

I just know that I’ve got 0 Firestarter and very little Side Hustler, so Tribe Member is the only one that could be my secondary, I think. 🙂

[Kristen W]

Hi Shona,

I agree, it sounds like you’re very clearly primarily a Thriver! And the fact that a lot of the values of a Tribe Member resonate with you (although maybe to a lesser extent than someone who’s primarily or fully a Tribe Member) makes me think you might have a bit of that too as a Secondary Profile.

In that case, I’d say it’s MOST important for you to evaluate your current work and/or look for work that first and foremost resonates with your Thriver values. You just might end up putting a little bit more emphasis on fulfilling work and a great team/culture than someone who’s a pure Thriver.

Hope that helps! 🙂

[Annabelle]

Hi again!
Just finished the Shifting your current work situation, about to restart the video etc for the next step. Then I thought I’d ask on here- I am currently unemployed and very much in limbo, taking time for me/to figure things out. So for ‘Identifying your values’ and ‘Shifting your current work situation’ sections I looked at my current life situation in general. For the uncovering values by looking at frustrations, I thought about general life right now and past jobs too. So I wanted to ask if that’s something you’d encourage for folks not currently in a job, or would you rather suggest just skipping those parts? I guess I went a little more life/general coaching on myself instead!
Cheers 🙂 Annabelle

[Rachel E]

Hey Annabelle,

You’re totally right to apply the identifying your values/shifting your current situation exercises to your general life, rather than just your career. The thing about values is that they’re almost never career-specific; what you value in your life is what you value in your career, and vice versa. Getting clear on what your life needs in order to feel good and for you to thrive will only help you in every area, career and beyond! 🙂

[Annabelle]

Thanks Rachel! Awesome, and that makes sense.

[Annabelle]

Ok, here’s another one: I’ve nearly completed the course, just about to do Wrapping up. One thing that’s lingering is I’m still not quite sure if my secondary profile is a Side Hustler or Firestarter (primary is Tribe member though I’m a paradoxical one I think- crave connection/community but struggle to find/sustain that, but I digress). I lean towards side hustler since it’s kind of an in between of tribe member and firestarter, and it was the profile I got years ago when I first took the quiz;also I’m multi passionate and value growth, really good at starting things but not so good at finishing things, and prone to analysis paralysis; but at the same time I resonate with firestarter re independence/not wanting to feel confined/the visionary piece/wanting to create. Any tips on figuring it out?

[Kristen W]

Hi Annabelle,

I’m glad you’re feeling clear on your Primary Profile, since that will have the biggest impact on how you define/identify the right working environment for you. And just because you’ve struggled to find/sustain the level of connection you crave doesn’t make you a paradoxical Tribe Member at all! If anything, it reinforces how important that is to you and just shows that you haven’t found the right kinds of supportive environments in the past.

As for your Secondary Profile… from everything you mentioned, my strong hunch is that you’re a Secondary Side Hustler. A lot of how you described yourself lines up with the Side Hustler profile (not to mention the fact that you’ve gotten that result in the past when you took the quiz!). And the parts of the Firestarter profile you mentioned being most attracted to are not exclusive to Firestarters — they’re the qualities that tend to overlap with Side Hustlers, and even Tribe Members to an extent. You sound like a Primary Tribe Member, Secondary Side Hustler to me! 🙂

Hope that helps!

[Annabelle]

Hi Kristen,

Sorry for my delayed reply, I really appreciated yours! I also just scrolled through the rest of this thread and one of the things that struck me was about profiles ebbing and flowing depending on where your life is at- and it really helped explain why during/after years of a pandemic and a lot of isolation I am so clear that I’m lacking/need connection and community in a way that years ago was easier to put off for variety/novelty/independence. So your feedback did help me trust more of my traits/profile alignments as I’ve had chronic second guessing tendencies!

I also think I’m a bit overwhelmed having nearly completed the course with lots of great ideas and a few glimpses of big shifts in my limiting beliefs and self judgements- all worthwhile and I want to keep trusting the process- but I can feel myself getting caught up in the ‘having to figure it all out’ mentality and overwhelm at all my ideas of next steps I might take- none of which seem to lead to a clear unfolding at this point. I guess I’m wondering if you have any advice for folks who maybe need more time to digest all this good stuff from the course, more time to break down/shift limiting beliefs and storylines, but not stagnate/get stuck in the reflection piece?
Even my (seemingly simple) first next step idea/plan to get an accountability partner seems kind of out of reach. It’s all (even my other ideas for next steps, and juggling other big picture life goals) feeling like a lot!
Thanks 🙂

[Kristen W]

Hi Annabelle,

Glad it was helpful! 🙂 And yes, it’s very normal for your Passion Profile combo to ebb and flow a bit in different phases of your life. So it makes total sense that your Tribe Member side is extra prominent right now, since it’s been craving connection and collaboration since the pandemic.

And if you’re feeling a bit overwhelmed right now, that’s totally OK and normal! We gave you a LOT to process in this course, and it clearly sparked lots of ideas for you (which I love to hear!). It’s no wonder your brain is spinning with all of this new insight! Here are a few things to keep in mind, which will hopefully relieve a bit of the overwhelm:

– You can go back through this course as many times as you need to, so if there are certain sections that you want to spend more time on (like the limiting beliefs, for example), you can revisit it whenever and however often you want.

– If the first action step you identified still feels out of reach, see if you can break it down even more. For example, instead of making your first step “get an accountability partner,” start smaller with something like “make a list of personality traits I’d like in an accountability partner.” Overwhelm is usually a sign that you’re trying to bite off more than you can chew, so you can take smaller bites! 🙂

– Remind yourself as many times as you need to that you do NOT need to have all the answers right now. Having a few ideas of things that feel exciting is a perfect place to be right now, and you may need to learn more or take a few small action steps in order to determine if an idea is right or not. Clarity comes from action, not thought!

– If you continue to feel stuck about how to implement all of the things you’ve learned in this course, that’s what 1-on-1 coaching is here for. Courses are a great way to learn a ton about certain topics and about yourself, but they’re DIY by nature, so there’s no one to hold you accountable for taking action and implementing — that’s why individual coaching is so powerful, because you have someone helping you get clear on what you want, figure out the next steps, overcome any limiting beliefs or roadblocks, and holding you accountable the whole way. Just something to consider, if that would be helpful!

[Annabelle]

Hi again, my apologies for such a delayed response. I’ve read yours a few times over the last few weeks, but wasn’t sure what to say yet/how to proceed! It was really helpful though, especially the reminder to go over the course as much as I need, and to break the action points down further. I’m also definitely thinking about 1:1 coaching, and just submitted my responses to that waiting list application!

I think I’ve been trying to build myself up in other parts of my life/getting distracted by trying to juggle things and not really getting anywhere; and some overwhelm (and paralysis) has been coming from putting off thinking about job stuff- as if it’s some separate entity from the rest of my life (maybe worried I’d over-focus on it and everything else would be left by the wayside, as has happened in the past). Also, in the mentality of thinking I have to hold it all, and figure job/passion/big picture stuff out before taking action, I’ve perhaps felt too daunted to think more about it.

Anyway, I felt like I’d lost momentum, but maybe I needed some time to digest/do other things, and the last few days I went back through the course v thoroughly and I’m feeling more focused and less overwhelmed! I have a list of job/setting options I can eliminate (from my non negotiables), and a list of the needs+nice to haves, and a list of the things I’m interested in doing+ideal work setting. I also have a more concise/doable list of action steps.
It was also really cool going back over the course and realizing I’ve already made progress challenging/unraveling some of the limiting beliefs I had at the start of the course! My plan is to at least weekly revisit/check in with limiting beliefs and examine/reframe them, almost like doing the dishes- I think a few are so ingrained I just keep needing to scrub away!

Lastly, to share/process (hope it’s ok!) a current aha wondering:
One belief I’ve had is I shouldn’t move city/country right now since I need the stability and support to live the life I want to, and because of covid. I’ve been thinking I can’t lose my therapist, friends, wider community; but just yesterday I thought woah- I’m a hummingbird; I’m someone who thrives on growth and variety as well as community/stability, and I deeply desire to feel passionate/care about the work I do. So maybe those things have become almost like crutches, bringing a false sense of safety even when I’m not living the life I want/need, even when they’re not actually as good as I keep hoping they might be.
Anyway, now I’m wondering if, as long as I’m intentional about only living places I can find those supports and the things I know I need- I think I need to be open to looking more widely for that next job.
I’m scared since I desperately want to actualize other parts of my life, and I find it really hard to build up community/friends let alone date. I don’t want to lose the good things about being where I am. BUT. I think I have been and will continue to settle, just trying to actualize the non-paid/non-work parts of my life, trying to heal/grow parts of me too, but not trying to/allowing myself to take steps to find the right job. I think life will keep passing me by, I might keep coasting, if I keep putting it off.
So I’m trying to/would like to keep building up my life, and stop putting off the job search/experiment. I’d like to recognize the fear coming from all the past rejections/years not getting my dream job, but remind myself I’m in a different place now, and I have these clear tools to screen for jobs that will work for me. I also have more self awareness and acceptance than I’ve ever had, and this is just the start. So what if I could find jobs that excite me, that fit all the parts of me and what I want, AND in the process (re)learn to live with passion that might just inspire the rest of my life.
I guess it’s about believing and then trying to live (and learn to live) a life where job is integrated with the rest of my life, where it all feels like living and one doesn’t get in the way of the other.

Ok, that was longer than expected. Thanks so much:)

[Rachel E]

Hey Annabelle!

I’m glad you took a break and came back to the content! Not only is that the best remedy for overwhelm, like you experienced, it allowed you time to integrate what you’ve been processing, and you were able to come back to it with a different perspective–one where you gave yourself credit for all the progress you’ve clearly made, which is awesome! 🙂

I love the idea of you challenging your limiting beliefs regularly as equivalent to “doing the dishes.” Yep, that’s so true! It’s one of those routine chores we need to do regularly in order to keep things tidy and healthy.

And as to your last point, it sounds like you’re discovering the value of both/and thinking! As in, the solution doesn’t have to be one or the other–either keep things the same and prioritize stability, or flip things on their head and decide to pursue novelty and variety, instead. Why not both? A lot of the time we don’t consider the nuanced option, because it’s usually way more complicated than just choosing “this or that.” But the stark either/or choice is almost never fulfilling! We need to honor both/all sides of who we are, which can take more time and energy and intention up front, but is infinitely more rewarding on the back end.

And the great thing about deciding that, “I get to have both! Now, how to make that work?” is that, once you declare it’s a possibility, you’ll start to see opportunities where you once might have missed them, because you weren’t open enough to them yet. It can become a fun challenge for you to solve, rather than an impossible task!

[Annabelle]

Hi Rachel!

Thanks so much! For sure, this was a reminder that the ’empty’ times are just as important as the ‘productive’ ones. Like a fire that needs space in between the logs for more oxygen, so it can burn brighter.

Ah, so true about the both/and thinking. I guess part of it is also that the nuanced option is like colouring outside the lines and seems less safe because it’s less known, as well as (as you said) more work because you’re not just following the path that’s already there.

I love that too about deciding to have both. It’s felt weirdly radical but freeing to acknowledge different parts of me and even just want to learnt to accept and honour them all instead of judging/suppressing/trying to be anything I’m not. It reminds me of something you mention at the start of the PPSC, that ultimately this is about giving yourself permission, and I’m glad through this course I’ve had a glimpse of a different way of thinking– and now see how for years I’ve tried to mould myself/allow what others think of as the right path to infuence my judgement and actions and even how I value myself. But really looking back over the years I’m reminded how capable I am and how much I can achieve when I trust my instincts and initiative, even when others haven’t been able to see it. So, thank you for helping me be reminded of that!

[TamaraJenkins]

Hi Kristen and Rachel!
So lovely to connect! I’ve been working through the Passion Profile Short Course, and my situation is a little different from most. I’m a Firestarter and my secondary profile is a Side Hustler. I’ve been running my own PR business for about 15 years, and being a Firestarter, I love the autonomy, the freedom and the total control over my finances, hours, etc. I cannot ever imagine going back to work for someone else. So, my business ticks many boxes.

However, the big box it does not tick is passion (which is the No 1 value I’m seeing in my life).

I basically went into PR because I enjoyed writing and my parents thought it would be a good career. It wasn’t something I truly wanted to do, but it happened. I worked at a number of PR agencies, left those because I could not take it anymore, and before I knew it, I had clients reaching out to me to do their PR. So,I set up a business and fast forward 15 years later.

I haven’t been happy for a LONG time, PR no longer lights me up (did it ever?), but I honestly don’t know where to turn. I want to keep running my own business, and am open to going back to study part-time to pursue something new, but how do I know what my passion is, and what I should be pursuing? I’ve been unhappy for a long time, but it’s this lack of clarity around next steps that keeps me trapped!

Any advice you could provide would be so amazing.

Thanks,

Tamara x

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