[Annabelle]

Hi Rachel!

Thanks so much! For sure, this was a reminder that the ’empty’ times are just as important as the ‘productive’ ones. Like a fire that needs space in between the logs for more oxygen, so it can burn brighter.

Ah, so true about the both/and thinking. I guess part of it is also that the nuanced option is like colouring outside the lines and seems less safe because it’s less known, as well as (as you said) more work because you’re not just following the path that’s already there.

I love that too about deciding to have both. It’s felt weirdly radical but freeing to acknowledge different parts of me and even just want to learnt to accept and honour them all instead of judging/suppressing/trying to be anything I’m not. It reminds me of something you mention at the start of the PPSC, that ultimately this is about giving yourself permission, and I’m glad through this course I’ve had a glimpse of a different way of thinking– and now see how for years I’ve tried to mould myself/allow what others think of as the right path to infuence my judgement and actions and even how I value myself. But really looking back over the years I’m reminded how capable I am and how much I can achieve when I trust my instincts and initiative, even when others haven’t been able to see it. So, thank you for helping me be reminded of that!

[Annabelle]

Hi again, my apologies for such a delayed response. I’ve read yours a few times over the last few weeks, but wasn’t sure what to say yet/how to proceed! It was really helpful though, especially the reminder to go over the course as much as I need, and to break the action points down further. I’m also definitely thinking about 1:1 coaching, and just submitted my responses to that waiting list application!

I think I’ve been trying to build myself up in other parts of my life/getting distracted by trying to juggle things and not really getting anywhere; and some overwhelm (and paralysis) has been coming from putting off thinking about job stuff- as if it’s some separate entity from the rest of my life (maybe worried I’d over-focus on it and everything else would be left by the wayside, as has happened in the past). Also, in the mentality of thinking I have to hold it all, and figure job/passion/big picture stuff out before taking action, I’ve perhaps felt too daunted to think more about it.

Anyway, I felt like I’d lost momentum, but maybe I needed some time to digest/do other things, and the last few days I went back through the course v thoroughly and I’m feeling more focused and less overwhelmed! I have a list of job/setting options I can eliminate (from my non negotiables), and a list of the needs+nice to haves, and a list of the things I’m interested in doing+ideal work setting. I also have a more concise/doable list of action steps.
It was also really cool going back over the course and realizing I’ve already made progress challenging/unraveling some of the limiting beliefs I had at the start of the course! My plan is to at least weekly revisit/check in with limiting beliefs and examine/reframe them, almost like doing the dishes- I think a few are so ingrained I just keep needing to scrub away!

Lastly, to share/process (hope it’s ok!) a current aha wondering:
One belief I’ve had is I shouldn’t move city/country right now since I need the stability and support to live the life I want to, and because of covid. I’ve been thinking I can’t lose my therapist, friends, wider community; but just yesterday I thought woah- I’m a hummingbird; I’m someone who thrives on growth and variety as well as community/stability, and I deeply desire to feel passionate/care about the work I do. So maybe those things have become almost like crutches, bringing a false sense of safety even when I’m not living the life I want/need, even when they’re not actually as good as I keep hoping they might be.
Anyway, now I’m wondering if, as long as I’m intentional about only living places I can find those supports and the things I know I need- I think I need to be open to looking more widely for that next job.
I’m scared since I desperately want to actualize other parts of my life, and I find it really hard to build up community/friends let alone date. I don’t want to lose the good things about being where I am. BUT. I think I have been and will continue to settle, just trying to actualize the non-paid/non-work parts of my life, trying to heal/grow parts of me too, but not trying to/allowing myself to take steps to find the right job. I think life will keep passing me by, I might keep coasting, if I keep putting it off.
So I’m trying to/would like to keep building up my life, and stop putting off the job search/experiment. I’d like to recognize the fear coming from all the past rejections/years not getting my dream job, but remind myself I’m in a different place now, and I have these clear tools to screen for jobs that will work for me. I also have more self awareness and acceptance than I’ve ever had, and this is just the start. So what if I could find jobs that excite me, that fit all the parts of me and what I want, AND in the process (re)learn to live with passion that might just inspire the rest of my life.
I guess it’s about believing and then trying to live (and learn to live) a life where job is integrated with the rest of my life, where it all feels like living and one doesn’t get in the way of the other.

Ok, that was longer than expected. Thanks so much:)

[Annabelle]

Hi Kristen,

Sorry for my delayed reply, I really appreciated yours! I also just scrolled through the rest of this thread and one of the things that struck me was about profiles ebbing and flowing depending on where your life is at- and it really helped explain why during/after years of a pandemic and a lot of isolation I am so clear that I’m lacking/need connection and community in a way that years ago was easier to put off for variety/novelty/independence. So your feedback did help me trust more of my traits/profile alignments as I’ve had chronic second guessing tendencies!

I also think I’m a bit overwhelmed having nearly completed the course with lots of great ideas and a few glimpses of big shifts in my limiting beliefs and self judgements- all worthwhile and I want to keep trusting the process- but I can feel myself getting caught up in the ‘having to figure it all out’ mentality and overwhelm at all my ideas of next steps I might take- none of which seem to lead to a clear unfolding at this point. I guess I’m wondering if you have any advice for folks who maybe need more time to digest all this good stuff from the course, more time to break down/shift limiting beliefs and storylines, but not stagnate/get stuck in the reflection piece?
Even my (seemingly simple) first next step idea/plan to get an accountability partner seems kind of out of reach. It’s all (even my other ideas for next steps, and juggling other big picture life goals) feeling like a lot!
Thanks 🙂

[Annabelle]

Ok, here’s another one: I’ve nearly completed the course, just about to do Wrapping up. One thing that’s lingering is I’m still not quite sure if my secondary profile is a Side Hustler or Firestarter (primary is Tribe member though I’m a paradoxical one I think- crave connection/community but struggle to find/sustain that, but I digress). I lean towards side hustler since it’s kind of an in between of tribe member and firestarter, and it was the profile I got years ago when I first took the quiz;also I’m multi passionate and value growth, really good at starting things but not so good at finishing things, and prone to analysis paralysis; but at the same time I resonate with firestarter re independence/not wanting to feel confined/the visionary piece/wanting to create. Any tips on figuring it out?

[Annabelle]

Thanks Rachel! Awesome, and that makes sense.

[Annabelle]

Hi again!
Just finished the Shifting your current work situation, about to restart the video etc for the next step. Then I thought I’d ask on here- I am currently unemployed and very much in limbo, taking time for me/to figure things out. So for ‘Identifying your values’ and ‘Shifting your current work situation’ sections I looked at my current life situation in general. For the uncovering values by looking at frustrations, I thought about general life right now and past jobs too. So I wanted to ask if that’s something you’d encourage for folks not currently in a job, or would you rather suggest just skipping those parts? I guess I went a little more life/general coaching on myself instead!
Cheers 🙂 Annabelle

[Annabelle]

Thanks so much! I love that. I’m only part way through the course but already excited by the aha moments!

[Annabelle]

Hi I’m Annabelle! I’m from the UK but have been living in the US for 5 years now. I’ve gotten both tribe member recently and side hustler in the past (but resonate with parts of all the profiles!!).
I’m great at ideas and thinking, but struggle to actualize them sometimes. Recently I’ve gotten clear on my current life goals and priorities, and among them was this idea of getting more intentional/structured support and accountability with my whole approach to passions/career/jobs, perhaps shaking it up since what I’ve been doing hasn’t quite been working for me. I know the general/abstract things I want to be doing with my life, but getting there and figuring out how job/income fits in with passion/meaning in a sustainable way is proving tricky.
Listening to your podcast I had a few lightbulb moments, including that maybe I should treat my passions as creativity and not put pressure on them to pay my bills (though then I get stuck on how to pay the bills). You also reminded me that I can ‘write my way into the plot’ and sitting around won’t bring me clarity. If I could have aha moments from a few podcasts, I thought there might be something to this.
So, this is my next step to writing my way into the plot, to get new insights and structure to move forward on things, and perhaps to figure out if 1:1 coaching is right for me.
Thanks so much 🙂

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